Two weeks ago, I spied the perfect pair of shoes: blue-gray and yellow wedges. They were different yet compelling. I'd plucked one out of the box for further consideration when I heard the text message alert. I set the shoe down while I dug my phone out of my purse.
It was my friend Shannon inviting me to sit with her and her family at church the next morning. Another mutual friend would be there and she suggested we go to Panera afterward.
I took a deep breath. Church.
Yes, my word for this year is Commit and yes, that means going to church consistently again. But did I have to start that weekend?
A few minutes later, I texted Shannon back: "You've made an offer I can't refuse."
And then I bought myself some cute shoes.
Even so, going to church was not a sure bet. I woke up Sunday morning hoping I'd follow through. How do I explain my reservations about attending church? How do I tease out the root issues and unpack the baggage that follows me still?
I've found a good church. I love this church. But it is so hard to go and I know the problem solely lies with me. Once I'm there, I'm happy I've come. Getting there is a whole other matter.
I dressed with care. Superficial or not, a cute outfit is always a good motivator in my book. I chose my favorite cashmere sweater for comfort and then, of course, the new shoes. There's something about high heels, no matter the occasion.
I thought about my friend saving me a seat. I thought about what a difference it makes knowing someone would be looking for me. And then I got in the car.
I walked into the sanctuary, the same one that made me feel like I'd come home a year ago. I greeted my friends and sipped a cup of coffee. I smiled wide when I saw 6 pink balloons at the front in honor of baby Pearl's 6 month birthday.
This is my church. This is what I love about it. This is why I'm glad I went.
But then another week went by and I didn't go to church last Sunday. I can't say whether I'll go this Sunday. I can't even tell you the reasons why because they're nothing and everything.
I'm taking this one week at a time. I'm trusting God will meet me wherever I am. I'm trusting one Sunday soon I'll return once more.
tank top, Old Navy
shoes, Seychelles (I appear to have snagged the last pair but this company might be my new obsession. Love their design philosophy: vintage-inspired with a modern twist. Yes, please.)
Chicago necklace, gift
earrings, Ike & Co.
Linking up with Dear Abby Leigh for Dress for the Day