This Is How We Met: Rachel Snyder's Story
02/09/2012
What can I say about The Lazy Christian? I'm so glad I could experience Rachel's wit and sarcasm in person at She Speaks this past July. Anyone who is up for a midnight dessert run is my kind of person. But that's not all there is to her. She has a depth and heart for others, as you'll see in her bio.
In July of 2003, I decided that the most important thing in my life would be God. I wasn’t going to chase any more boys. None! Not one! Boys were nothing but trouble!
In September of 2003, I went to my Sunday morning young adult Bible Study. It was informally known as one of the “singles” groups at my church in Akron. I’d been going for a couple of months, and there were about 15 of us in the group.
But that morning, there was a new guy.
Cue “Dream Weaver.”
He sat across from me. I quickly whispered to the friend next to me, “Hey, do you know who that is?” She told me his name was Brandon and that he usually went to the Sunday evening singles group. I’d tried that group once, but I thought it was skewing older and I hadn’t returned.
If only I’d seen him!
After the class was over, my friend asked Brandon if he’d like to join a group of us for lunch. He did. It may have been the weirdest lunch I’d ever experienced. Brandon and I seemed to have some strange connection where we just got each other. We finished each other’s sentences—on day one! Day. One.
That afternoon, I called my dad and told him I met the man I was going to marry.
His reply: “We’ll see about that, Rachel Anne.”
We will, indeed, Father.
A few weeks later, I got up the nerve to ask Brandon out for coffee. He said yes! We spent two and a half hours talking. No breaks, no awkward pauses. It was perfect!
I’d like to say we immediately started dating and were married ten seconds later. We didn’t. Turns out he’d met another girl two weeks before that he was interested in. In the evening class (which, of course, I then started attending). In fact, the day after we had our amazing coffee date, I watched him walk over and ask her for her number. I was crushed!
And I got the “just friends” speech the next week. Ouch.
We continued hanging out while he started dating the other girl. They never got serious—they barely had more than a few dates over the course of five months. But Brandon and I hung out all the time. And we had conversations like this:
Brandon: You know, I said last summer I wasn’t going to date anyone.
Me: Me, either! That’s so weird!
Brandon: And then I met her. Isn’t that just from God?
Me: And two weeks later, you met me.
Brandon: Oh, yeah. I guess that’s true.
Me: *smacks forehead*
The following spring, I started keeping a prayer journal over Lent. You should see it. I prayed about Brandon. I prayed that he would either love me back or that I would fall out of love with him, but, either way, I wanted him to be happy. I prayed this every day. Every. Single. Day.
After all of that, the other girl finally ended things with him. And he finally asked me out. But it was—weird. I mean, I was so cautious with our relationship up until then that we’d never even sat on the same couch together. Never held hands, never hugged. And suddenly we were dating. And kissing. It just happened so fast! We were both knocked off our feet.
It lasted a week. One week. He dumped me on Lousy Thursday, which is what I now call the day before Good Friday.
I was heartbroken. I knew it had been too good to be true! Of course he didn’t want me! He hadn’t wanted me for the six months before that! Why would he want me now? It hurt so much, I even had to stop talking to him for a couple of weeks. And we’d e-mailed all day long, every day, for months. We talked on the phone several times a day (including that all-important just-before-bed call). He was my best friend! How was I going to live without him?
I wasn’t. God saw to that.
Turns out he was scared. He knew how perfect I was for him, but that meant he might marry me. And to any 23-year-old guy, that’s daunting. We slowly started our relationship over: holding hands now and then, sitting close to one another. You know—slow, normal steps.
That was in May. He proposed to me in September. We were married the following May.
Almost seven years later, we still finish each other’s sentences, and we still get each other in the same deep, matching way we did the first day we talked. Which is funny, considering how opposite we are in just about every way possible. God created us perfectly for one another—I have no doubts about that.
So if anyone tells you there’s no such thing as love at first sight, they’re wrong. It just may be one-sided for a while.
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Rachel A. Snyder lives in Indianapolis with her husband and son (and has a daughter on the way!). After some time as a journalist and an English teacher, she is now a stay-at-home mom and freelance editor. Contact Rachel at [email protected] with questions, comments, or prayer requests, as she has resolved to become a prayer warrior this year.
You can catch Rachel at her blog The Lazy Christian, Facebook page, and Twitter.