Leigh Kramer

Introducing The MK Box

(This post was not perked in any way but there is a special deal for readers at the end.)

By the time the September issues of InStyle and Vogue arrive in the mail, I've already pondered what sweaters and cozy shirts my fall wardrobe requires. Autumn inspires me to shop, possibly because it's my favorite season but more likely because sweaters are my love language.

Fall in San Francisco is different from fall in the Midwest or South. While Nashville often boasted pleasant warm days, San Francisco's summer and fall appear to have swapped places. We've had more than several hot days and I've barely worn my cardigans, after practically living in them in July and August. The mornings start out cool when I leave home but I'm usually quite warm by the time I leave work.

The name of the game is layers.

Since moving to San Francisco and starting an office job, I've noticed areas where my wardrobe lacked and have slowly been filling in the gaps. Shopping is more complicated here (what bus line will I take? if I drive, will there be parking? how many bags can I carry while walking home?) so I've relied more on the convenience of ordering online.

But it's also really important to find clothes that are unique to me. 

Enter The MK Box.

They threw in some chocolate. *happy dance*

The MK Box is a brand new styling service offering a hand curated clothing box of 5 items delivered straight to your doorstep. Does this remind you of Stitch Fix? They're similar but there are some big differences. A selling point for me: MK Box offers the option of fabulous vintage pieces, to which I say please and thank you.

Started by friends Maria and Krissa, the MK Box isn't a membership service. You can order a box whenever you want, however often you want it. You'll receive 5 items for a flat rate of $99, plus $8 S&H. There are no returns unless you don't want to keep all 5 items. However, you can sell or trade what you don't want to keep in the Facebook group.

I was nervous about the lack of a return policy but I thought it was worth a try and I'm glad I did.

Here's what I got in my first MK Box. 

1. This shirt by eyeshadow was the first thing I pulled out of the box and I promptly wore it that night. I have worn it at least 2 other times since. It's my new favorite!

It's made out of a super comfortable sweatshirt material and I love the lace accents. I also love that I've never seen a shirt like it before.

2. The second shirt also had a lacy detail, which I'm all about this fall. I was a little uncertain about this one before I tried it on. This is normally the kind of shirt I'd be drawn to but I've been trying to wear more fitted clothes the past couple of years to show off my waist per my stylist friend Megan's mandate. But I can wear a more drapey top if I pair it with skinny jeans or leggings. Problem solved!

3. The third and final shirt is by Deb. I'm not much of a floral pattern wearer but I have been drawn to some floral patterns when they've had dark backgrounds. While I'm trying to wear more fitted tops, this is clingier than I'm used to so I decided to pair it with black wide-leg pants and tuck it in. This was an inspired idea, if I do say so myself. The scooped back is a fun change, too!

4. The past year or two I've thought about getting a trench coat but I haven't found any that I had to have. So I was more than pleased to see this vintage number appear in my MK Box. Maria and Krissa wrote they included the coat specifically because of the SF climate. It made me wonder if they've been reading my mind. I swooned when I pulled it out of the box!

5. Skinny black jeans. Sadly, I will not be keeping these. They're too snug for my taste. I've listed them in the Facebook Group and if no one bites, I'll probably sell them via thredUP.

All in all, I'm really pleased with my experience.

 

Tips for requesting your MK Box:

1. While I filled out a style questionnaire when I requested my first box, this isn't currently available on their website. However, you do provide your sizes and there is an area for you to leave a note for Maria and Krissa. Be very thorough in your note. Include what items you're hoping to add to your closet and what they should avoid. Mention any colors or patterns you don't like or don't want anymore of.

While I filled the questionnaire out, I actually pulled up my Stitch Fix profile so I could give them the most accurate reflection of my style. Mostly, I didn't want to end up with anything orange or paisley, which I never wear.

 

2. Be honest about your style. What do you really, truly wear as opposed to what you think or wish you wear? Styling services are great at helping us try things we might otherwise overlook but it has to be rooted in your actual style or you'll never wear what they send.

 

3. If you have a Pinterest board for Stitch Fix or your fashion faves, include the link in your note. If you don't have something like this, start one. Here's mine. I note what I like or don't like about anything I pin.

For instance, with this pin, I said, "I love the idea of these layers with skinny jeans, though I'd skip the heels now that I ride a bus to work most days." Or this one: "I am so drawn to this sweater, even though I should probably wear something more fitted. It's hard to resist a cozy sweater though!"

 

MK Box is a new company finding its footing. Their ordering process could use some improvement but the quality of the styling service is on point. They're open to feedback and I have no doubt they'll continue to streamline their service. I love the interesting pieces they offer and their aesthetic and will surely be ordering another box from them in the future. 

 

Through October 31, 2015, LeighKramer.com readers who purchase an MK Box receive free shipping with the code FREESHIP. Be sure to tell them I sent you!

Heads up: if you refer 5 friends who purchase full price boxes, you can receive your next box for just $59 plus $8 S&H. Just make sure when your friends fill out their form to request a box they put down your name as the person who referred them. Ahem.

 

What are you adding to your wardrobe this fall?

I'm a Pixie

This is what happens when I'm making a Big Decision or contemplating a Major Change.

A seed of an idea presents itself. "No, no, I couldn't do that."

"Hmm. Well, maybe I could do that. But not now. Later. Much, much later."

"Except...it would be kind of awesome." I start visualizing the potential change and imagining all kinds of wonderful scenarios. (Being a novelist and book nerd can get me into trouble.)

"OK, no, definitely not doing that. I don't have the guts!" I start working through all the reasons why it won't work.

"Not true. I do have guts. And I kind of want to do it but..."

To my inner circle: "So I've been thinking about maybe kind of..." This generally elicits much enthusiasm and affirmation because I've already run it through every angle.

Ponder, ponder, ponder. Think, think, think.

At last, the decision clicks into place. "Holy buckets! I'm going to do it!" Then it's full steam ahead, no turning back.

This process takes months, if not years. Y'all don't even want to know the things I'm contemplating right now. Let's just say change is afoot.

In the last several months, a few different friends told me I'd look great with a pixie cut. Given how attached I am to my long hair, I'd laugh nervously and mutter about how I've tried the short hair thing and it's not for me.

It's easy to let hair define me. To say I feel more myself with long hair. I've wondered though, whether my long hair was another way of hiding.

This past month I started thinking losing a few inches of hair, adding some layers, and going for a sassier vibe. I was due for a haircut this month but wasn't ready for any major changes.

Maybe I'd work my way up to the pixie cut eventually.

Then my inner circle brought up Beyonce's short haircut on Thursday and I threw out the idea of lopping off my own long locks. Could I pull it off? They pounced and ran with it, telling me I'd look amazing and discussing possible styles. While a few counseled me to be really, really sure I wanted to do it, others began chanting "PIXIE CUT!"

Moment of reckoning: it was time for me to boldly and confidently become a pixie.

Photo source

I looked at pictures of pixie cuts for inspiration. Ginnifer Goodwin's look has long been a favorite.

I messaged my stylist Michelle Loomis and told her my scheme. She was instantly on board. We went back and forth on whether I would go for a gateway haircut to ease my way into a pixie. I wanted to go all the way but I had no idea what I would decide until I sat in her chair.

Let me remind you: while I'd loosely contemplated a pixie cut for months, this all went down Thursday. Saturday morning I met up with a friend at the farmers market and then made my way over to Synergy where Michelle awaited.

As we talked about haircut options, resolve and clarity emerged. Whether motivated by bravery or hair boredom, I was going for it.

While I've regularly grown my hair out only to chop it off (as recently as spring 2010), I'd never tried a pixie cut before. I didn't want another short bob. I didn't want a gateway haircut, especially when cutting it all off meant a hair donation to Pantene Beautiful Lengths.

It was time for a change. Time to let go of the old and welcome the new.

I've been thinking about this Jesus Year of mine. My birthday in January seemed so full of possibility and yet I was met with personal setbacks until I went to Uganda and Burundi. That trip felt like an awakening and in so many ways, I am myself again. Myself but renewed and energized and ready for what's next.

There's no better way to mark this change than by letting go.

Michelle sectioned off my hair into rubber bands so it would be donation ready. Then she cut them off. I couldn't stop laughing. There was no turning back, nor did I want to.

This is the new me. I'm marking a new season.

  Ta da!

  Suddenly feeling the need for a neck tattoo

10 inches of hair lighter = FREEDOM

Today, with my pixie cut in place, I have no regrets. I feel amazing and free and sassy as all get out.

I can't believe I did it.

I LOVE IT!!!

Watch out, world. It's about to get interesting.

My Shopping Secret

I'm going to let you in on a secret: I dress up when I go shopping.

Clothes shopping, to be specific.

Yes, Target and Publix get me in my regular day-to-day attire but I make an extra effort if I'm mall-bound. I have even been known to wear (comfortable) heels.

I realize it may sound silly. Who dresses up to go shopping? Me. I do. And I have my reasons.

 

I'm giddy to be guest posting for my friend Dear Abby Leigh today. Head on over to read the rest of my Dress For The Day confession and learn all about my new obsession (Popbasic = !!!!).

Seeking: the Perfect Pair of Jeans and a Wingman

This story is about great customer service but it is also a story of my desperate need for a wingman. Here's how it happened.

One late January day found me free of work responsibilities. Ever since my friend Megan gave me constructive style criticism, I'd meant to go jeans shopping. She told me to look for matchstick jeans and recommended J. Crew.

I'd tried jeans at a few locations but I hadn't made it over to J. Crew because it's located at the Green Hills mall, at which I rarely shop. THE TRAFFIC, I tell you. Nothing drives me crazier than bad drivers and Tennessee is rife with them. This is especially evident in Green Hills. It's best to go on a weekday.

My best friend and her daughter accompanied me to the mall. I'll tell you this much: 4 year olds are great for my self-esteem. Anna thinks I look wonderful in everything I wear. I'm keeping her around for life.

I've been shopping at J. Crew for almost two decades now, which makes me feel old. My parents gave me a cream cardigan when I was in high school and that sucker is still in great shape.

Their clothes fit me well.  I've only ever received indifferent customer service. I'm not a Big Spender. I get it.

All this to say, when good customer service happens, I take note.

I circled the store until I found the Matchstick Jeans. The sizing confused me (waist length- why?) so I grabbed a few different sizes for good measure. I started examining the colored pants, something I've wanted to try. I didn't expect to talk to anyone until I was ready for a dressing room, when an affable young man appeared before me.

His other colleagues had walked by with nary a smile. This guy grinned, greeted me, and asked if I needed any help. When I declined, he offered to set up a dressing room for me. And then- and then- he complimented the owl earrings I was wearing.

It's like he knew the way to my heart.

I told him my friend Amber made them. He replied that's the best kind of gift. Before I knew it, we developed a lovely rapport, setting the tone for the rest of my time in the store.

We traded names and I suppressed a laugh when I learned his name was Matt, just like my brother. Matt & Leigh go together. It made it easy for me to remember his name.

I grabbed a pair of Minnie pants in Boulevard Green. Just to see. When it was time to try everything on, Matt saw I had Tracy and Anna with me. He upgraded us to a huge dressing room so we'd have enough room.

He checked on us regularly, bringing a coloring book and stickers to entertain Anna and bringing me different sizes of jeans.

Is this what a good sales person should do? Well, yes. But Matt consistently went above and beyond. Can I emphasize again this has never happened to me at J. Crew before?

Should I also mention that Matt happened to be cute? And he knew how to banter?

While we ascertained he was, in fact, straight, I thought he was too young for me.

But still. My mind goes completely blank in these situations. Once I think a guy is attractive, I lose my ability to make normal, interesting conversation. I respond to questions, in hopefully not too awkward form, but I literally can't think about how to interact with them.

I need a wingman. Everywhere I go. (The interaction with the cute cable guy earlier this week was utter confirmation of this truth.)

You may be thinking, "wait! Tracy and Anna were with you. Why didn't Tracy act as your wingman?"

Excellent question. Tracy?

In any case, I bought the Matchstick Jeans and the Minnie Pants. They both fit perfectly. Matt checked me out (ahem) at the register. I think I responded mostly intelligently, all the while wondering what question I could ask to further the conversation.

Nothing.

I left the store with product in hand and no phone number. I then posted on Facebook and Twitter about my wonderful shopping experience.

Wouldn't you know? I did hear from someone at J. Crew, who passed along my praises.

They did not pass along my phone number to Matt. I didn't even think to ask!

Live and learn.

(Let the record show I'm 99% sure the gentleman in question is too young for me. I'd rather not know just how young.)

 

Coat, LOFT (several years old but still holding strong)

Shirt, Stitch Fix

(brief note: I never would have bought this shirt on my own. The suede front panel and elbow patches, black and brown together...it wouldn't have grabbed me. It's now one of my favorite things. This is why I use Stitch Fix. They stretch me in the best of ways.)

Minnie Pants in Stretch Twill, J. Crew

Shoes, Target (similar)

Owl Earrings, gift (incidentally, what I wore while shopping at J. Crew)

 

The reason these pictures are taken in a park: the nieces-in-love wanted to play. I love best friend reunion weekends. I also love that it's the end of coat season.

Linking up with Dear Abby Leigh for Dress for the Day

Disclosure: Affiliate links included in this post but I'm not receiving any special perks for mentioning my great customer service experience at J. Crew.

The Intention of a Red Plaid Scarf

Two weeks ago I experienced a Vulnerability Hangover like none other after publishing The Morning After. The response was amazing and yet I needed to disappear for a few days after discussing something so intimate.

Ten days ago I shuffled through old cards and letters and came across one from my best friend, written after she'd visited me. I'd lived in Nashville about 7 or 8 months at that point and she encouraged me not to lose momentum. It hit me anew.

A week ago I realized two things. First, the next day was Valentine's Day. Second, I'd read 11 books in two weeks.

I'm no fan of Valentine's Day but last year I decided to view it as a day to celebrate all the love in my life. And it was good. I haven't worn much pink in ages but red continues to weave its siren song around me. I made a concession to the holiday and threw on a red plaid scarf, a hand-me-down from one of my favorite people. It seemed fitting to wear a scarf from a friend on such a day.

This is as Valentine-y as I can get.

It also seemed fitting to ignore the Valentine-inspired posts telling singles what to do and how to feel. I felt perfectly fine in my singleness and perfectly fine eating pesto and pasta and dark chocolate covered blueberries by myself. Of course, Damon from TVD didn't hurt either.

Five days ago I chatted with friends in Google Hangout and one asked me how I was doing and my mind went blank. These weren't friends to whom I could merely say "I'm fine." They know the things I haven't listed here. But how was I doing? I didn't know.

The bits and pieces of the last two weeks percolated and condensed to an answer: I'm stuck.

I tend to notice and accumulate awhile before processing what it all means, if it even needs to be processed in the first place. While I'm self-aware, I don't always notice internal changes right away. Reading so many books doesn't always mean Something Is Wrong, for instance. But when I reviewed the other evidence, I had to admit something was definitely off-kilter.

The last year or so has provided distinct assurance I am not the one in control. More than a few situations have arisen leaving me feel helpless. I've tried to be kind to myself and stay on top of meeting my needs. I've tried to address the gaps in my community and untangle the reasons why I'm skittish about attending a church I love. I've tried to focus on projects but so many weeks have gone by without even a passing glance. I've grown more insular in my attempts to heal.

Trying isn't always enough.

My SAD has returned in some small measure, even though we've had our share of sunny days this winter. There's a lot I can't do right now: go to church consistently, go to small group, focus on blogging and writing at the same time, balance old friends and new friends, or have more than one weeknight plan.

I don't hide my propensity for self-care but I'm still learning to distinguish when to pull back and when to push through.

Truthfully, I'm not sure about the way forward or if there even needs to be. I'm sitting here and taking stock and it's not all bad. It's time for new priorities and habits but the way there will meander.

But I can wear a red scarf on Valentine's Day and I can look for little opportunities to seize joy. I can stir a pot of Portabella Mushroom and Thyme Risotto while the rising steam bathes me in its aroma. I can sign up for an e-course about the spiritual practices of life and the kitchen. I can say yes to Africa.

I can meet a new friend for coffee and start a Family Dinner Night with my best friend's family. I can call my cousin to catch up. I can pray for all that is out of my control and all that is within my control. I can designate a night or two just for my dreams and inch toward following through.

I'm still reveling in the now; it just looks different right now.

Moment by moment, intention by intention, I will get unstuck.

  Out of focus seemed appropriate.

cream 3/4 length sleeve sweater, Gap

brown henley t-shirt, Old Navy

red plaid scarf, hand-me-down

earrings, Etsy

 

Linking up with Dear Abby Leigh for Dress for the Day